Thursday, May 22, 2008

Actual Conversations Heard in Actual Libraries #132

SETTING: My "liberry" as recently re-poop-listed patron Ms. Green is using one of our computers, "assisting" her son with another school report. As in accordance with tradition, Ms. Green's cell phone has gone off three previous times during the evening. However, because she is now well aware of our anti-cell policy, she has hauled butt and phone to the breezeway to take each call as soon as the ring has started. The breezeway, being a small, glassed in, boxy room, only amplifies conversations held within it, which sort of defeats the purpose of people taking their calls there in the first place.

*FOURTH LOUD MUSICAL CELL PHONE RING OF THE EVENING*

MS. GREEN-- (Books it to the foyer, answers her phone and screams...) Stop calling me!!! I'm at the library!!!!

(Listens to someone, perhaps her other kid, presumably asking when she's coming home)

MS. GREEN-- I don't know! When I'm finished! It's like pulling teeth here and he's only making it worse!

(Listens)

MS. GREEN-- Stop calling me!!!

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Bad parents are perhaps the most annoying part about being a children's librarian. They say terrible things to their kids, drag their children around by their hair, and worst of all leave them unattended so that you have to find them. When you do locate the parent they are mad at both of you! Bawling four year old and irritated librarian both get yelled at for wanting to know where she was.

Oh the joy!


An employee of a small town "liberry" chronicles his quest to remain sane while dealing with patrons who could star in a short-lived David Lynch television series.