Rif, our teenage, home-schooled long-time "liberry" ally, who also takes a class or two at the local community college, dropped a bombshell of wonderment on us yesterday.
According to him, Chester the (Potential) Molester
has somehow secured a job as a janitor at said community college. So
now he has an official excuse to stand around ogling the young ladies
who attend. And, also according to Rif, since standing around ogling is
pretty much all Chester does when he's on the job, he's a spectacularly
Now, being as how it's technically
Chester's job to keep that place clean and being as how he technically
might get fired for NOT keeping it clean, I suddenly find myself
overwhelmed by a deep sense of kinsmanship with all the people who've
been tracking ice, mud, salt and gravel through our library. In fact, I
have a great urge to go buy some hip waders, find a large quantity of
mud and go on a stroll down the halls of the community college. After
all, if he's going to work there, he ought to be kept busy.
that, and since most of the mud around here is frozen, I do know where I
can get my hands on a copious and so far ever-replenishing supply of
cat shit. I could use it to undertake a private study of just how
accurately I could recreate the fecal-carpet-staining scene from Drop Dead Fred.
"Dog poo, dog poo, smelly smelly dog poo!"