Wednesday, January 05, 2005

Actual Telephone Conversations in Actual Libraries #12

SFX:  (Phone dialing followed by ringing)

LADY: Hello?

ME: Hi this is JUICE from the TRI-METRO county library calling for Laura Bethman?

LADY: Who?

ME: (Annunciating heavily) Lau-ra Beth-man.

LADY: I'm sorry, you must have the wrong number.

ME: (Quickly comparing the number from the interlibrary loan print-out with the number I just dialed on the digital readout of our phone; it's exactly the same) Um, can I just confirm the number I dialed. Is this 555-6543?

LADY: Well, that's our number, but there's no Laura Bethman here. This is the George residence.

ME: (Reconsulting the ILL printout.) Ah, hah. I see that I have mistaken the author of the book with the patron who requested it.

LADY: Oh.

ME: So I'm actually calling for Elliot George. We have a book for him. By Laura Bethman.

LADY: Okay. I'll tell him.

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An employee of a small town "liberry" chronicles his quest to remain sane while dealing with patrons who could star in a short-lived David Lynch television series.