Poor Bubba

I went to work at 1 today and Mrs. C told me to go read the sign on the front door. The sign said the library would be closing at 5.

Whoo hoo! I get to go home early! This is good, as the wife is coming home from Clarksburg for the weekend and I had been a bit concerned as to how quickly I would have to come up with dinner after getting off at 7.

As to WHY we were closing early, Mrs. C enlightened me...

It seems we have fleas.

That's right, fleas.

Mrs. J found several of the little buggers attempting to bite her while she was shelving today. Suddenly, almost everyone was finding little bumps on their ankles that they had been at a loss to explain until that moment. So the plan was for us to close early and bug bomb the snot out of them. (Why exactly we needed to close early in order to bug bomb them, I'm not sure. Seems just as simple to bug bomb them after 7 as it would be after 5, but I certainly kept my mouth shut on this point.)

Mrs. A, still on vacation this week, but doing so at home, phoned in to give us some new policy regarding the fleas. To keep fleas from coming back after they've been bombed, we are now outlawing all animals other than service animals in the library. We've been very dog friendly in the past, allowing them to run free in the library. However, during most weeks, the dog population pretty much amounts to Mr. B-Natural's pooch Bubba. It will be sad to have a library with no Bubba, but what are ya gonna do? We can't have fleas infesting the joint either.

Mrs. C was the one to break the news to Mr. B-Natural when he and Bubba came in for their mid-morning computer crossword puzzle.

"What?" Mr. B-Natual said. He's supposedly hard of hearing, but I'm pretty sure it's a selective condition.

"I said, you can't bring Bubba in any more," she said. "We're having trouble with fleas."

"He shouldn't have any fleas. I gave him the flea treatment and washed him. No, Bubba doesn't have any fleas," Mr. B said. Of course, while he was saying this, Bubba was sitting on the floor beside him violently scratching at a flea.

"We're not saying Bubba brought the fleas in," Mrs. C told him. (Who is she kidding? That's exactly what we're saying.) "We're just saying that we have fleas and we don't want any more and you don't want them getting on Bubba either."

After Mrs. C related the above story, I said, "You do realize, of course, that Bubba will now become the new smuggled coffee cup for him, right? He'll start trying to sneak that dog in in his coat, just like he did his coffee."

Hours later in the day, the phone rang and a gruff voice asked to speak to Mrs. A.

"I'm sorry, but she's on vacation this week," I said.  "Can I take a message?"

Mr. B-Natual's familiar grumbling commenced for a few seconds before it resolved into the phrase, "When will she be back?" I told Mr. B-Natural she'd be in on Monday. Apparently, he's none too happy about his dog being banned. I'm not really sure why, other than it's an opportunity for him to be all grumpy about something. No other library in the county allows him to bring Bubba in, so I don't see what the big deal is now that we won't. Of course, it's not like he hasn't tried other places.

Mrs. H, who also works at the library branch in Town-D, said Mr. B-Natural tried to bring Bubba in her library one day until the head librarian saw the dog and said, "Nope. Out. He can't come in."

Mr. B-Natural paused in the door and shouted, "Hateful old woman!" then he took Bubba back to his car and left.

Now that's the old Mr. B-Natural we all knew and loathed.