ME— Tri-Metro County Library.
TELEMARKETER— (Female voice with thick Indian accent) Hello, my name is (name said too quickly to catch) and I am calling on behalf of (company name said too quickly to catch). May I please speak to the owner of the business?
ME— Um, this is a public library.
TELEMARKETER— Yes. May I please speak to the owner of the business?
ME— Well, that's going to be kind of hard. There are quite a few of them.
TELEMARKETER— I'm sorry?
ME— This is a public library.
TELEMARKETER— Yes. May I please speak to the... May I... Maybe you can help me to understand?
ME— We're a PUBLIC. LIBRARY.
TELEMARKETER— Are you a person who is able to make decisions for the business?
ME— No. I am an employee of a public library. I can't make decisions.
TELEMARKETER— May I speak to someone who is able to make decisions for the business?
ME— No. She's not here at the moment, but she doesn't take sales calls.
TELEMARKETER— But I am not selling you something, yet.
ME— Even so.
TELEMARKETER— I would please like to ask you a few questions about your...
ME— I'm sorry, but I don't think I can answer your questions. I'm the only employee at work right now and I need to go.
TELEMARKETER— When would be a more convenient time to call back?
ME— Again, my boss does not take sales calls or telemarketing calls. We're a public library. We're not really set up for this sort of thing.
TELEMARKETER— Thank you very much, and have a good evening.
ME— You too.
PATRON STANDING AT DESK— Dude, you were far more patient with them than I would have been.
(The moral of this story is that apparently not only are America's help desk jobs being outsourced overseas, but now our telemarketing jobs are as well.)