Monday, February 21, 2005

Actual Semi-Paraphrased Telephone Conversations Heard in Actual Libraries #18


MRS. C: Hi. This is MRS. C at the TRI-METRO County Public Library. We've had a several patrons come in who said you told them we had free tax preparation help. I just wanted to let you know that we don't offer that here. Only TOWN-C's branch does that and we're TOWN-A.

RECEPTIONIST: (Most defensively and pissily) We already know that! No one here has said anything like that. We haven't told anybody that.

MRS. C: Well, our patrons seem to think otherwise.

RECEPTIONIST: No one here would have said that!

MRS. C: Okay, then. Just wanted to make sure you knew.

RECEPTIONIST: We do. We know that.

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An employee of a small town "liberry" chronicles his quest to remain sane while dealing with patrons who could star in a short-lived David Lynch television series.